vinegar_dog (vinegar_dog) wrote,

Challenge 18 - Make me a list, check it twice on Farscapeland

Space creatures, critters and monsters


These are massive space monsters, quite rare alive, they like to disguise themselves as harmless moons

They however can be extremely dangerous as they consider energy fields electromagnetic candy and therefore tend to swallow you and your spaceship whole at which juncture you would not be blamed if you were to exclaim:


Once inside one, you are basically frelled! Their stomachs are infernal furnaces and your options are extremely limited. Freeing yourself from one will take a superhuman effort, imagination and considerable luck. Not often this can be said, but vomit is the solution. Coming out of their backsides is not!

Dead budongs seem to be more common in the Uncharted Territories – their bodies are mined for precious stones and used as small moon sized bases. The smell of dead budong is said to be quite powerfully revolting, however the moral of the story is – a dead budong is far preferable to a live one!

2. Strannats
These lobster like creatures are native of a planet called Kanvia. They are extremely attuned to brain wave patterns and sensitive to cognitive dissonance and therefore used as living lie detectors – in a few words if you lie, they know it! So if you find yourself on Kanvia and a strannat is placed on your head, our heartfelt advice is to tell the truth or you can kiss your eema goodbye – why? – because strannats’ automatic response to lying is to bury one of their deadly stingers through your brain.

In spite of the lethal punishments meted out to liars or maybe because of them, strannats have been known to inspire poetry of the highest standard – famous across the Uncharted Territories are the immortal rhymes:

“Let's cut the crap. Let's cut to the chase - stick this critter on my face… Cross my heart, smack me dead, stick a lobster on my head.”

A truly honest person’s anthem!

If you ask me, I think a strannat should be mandatorily issued to every politician in the universe coming into office…but that’s just my opinion! Give me a hell yeah! if you agree.

3. Wolaxan Arachnids
These creatures are most often found in Tormented Space. They are highly intelligent and disguise their true appearance but taking innocuous and somehow appealing semblances to fit in and work their way among unsuspecting crews, however in their natural state they look pretty much like giant spiders. Their aim is to feed on the energy of their victims, but not just any energy, they focus on the strongest character trait, first of all accentuating it though physical contact and then by stealing it away leaving their victims acting in exactly the opposite way they normally would. So for example the brave are turned into wimps, jolly people into wet blankets and so on and so forth.

These spider like creatures encapsulate the stolen energy in bright green orbs which then get stored away for later feeding. The victims will eventually die a horrible death covered in weeping sores and lesions.

Only known way to kill them is to stick your pulse rifle straight into their mouths and fire. At which point in the words of a famous human astronaut:

“Along came a spider - exploded beside her...”

These creatures may be horrific adversaries when alive, but when dead they actually make for a great spider stew!

4. Vorcs
These creatures are a lot more complicated than on first appearance. A vorc in its relaxed, non hunting state will look like a cute shrivelled little old, bald alien man. Its character is mainly playful : it will naughtily run away from you, climb into your bed, go to the toilet on your clean floors and vigorously hump your leg if let! However vorcs are also extremely useful hunters, their instinct is in fact to locate and destroy a particular and extremely dangerous type of virus, which will take over your body, wrap it in a cocoon, then replace you with a replica while slowly sucking and feeding your true essence (the one wrapped in the cocoon) – all very complicated but to simplify, vorcs will come to your help, if you let them, by killing this virus. However in their hunting mode, vorcs transform into larger clawed fat ninja like creatures of non too pleasant appearance, which is the reason you could get fooled into believing they are actually the enemy.

Be warned, when aware of the true kind nature of vorcs, you can become very attached and consider them pets. Like all pet owners, me included, will attest, you will find yourself trying to communicate with the vorc and asking it questions and expecting explanations, which are unfortunately beyond its limited vocal capabilities – this will lead to surreal conversations such as:

You to the Vorc: Are you the parasite?
Your scornful partner to you: The answer to that is “NO”. Who is gonna say yes to that? That is – NO!

As with all dearly beloved pets, the death of a Vorc can be extremely emotional and painful but, not to sound too callous, it helps and awful lot if you have a John Crichton to console you!

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